I Ain't One To Gossip But .....

Lindsay Lohan recently shot scenes as a guest star on Charlie Sheen's Anger Management and had so much fun that she decided to do what she does best.

Get high and crash a car? Not this time.

She stole 2 bracelets, sunglasses, a pair of shoes, gold earrings, a silk bathrobe, lingerie, tap shorts and, because this is how she rolls, a necklace from the set. It’s unclear if they were a gift for being so good on the show—she kept them waiting for two hours one day and continually forgot her lines …. of dialogue, I mean—or if she pulled another heist like she’s been known to do.

For her part, rather than deny she’s a thief, Lindsay is actually admitting she took the items but says she told the show they could take it out of her salary.

The show says they had no such deal with Lohan but will probably just write it off. They have bigger things to worry about, you know, like Charlie Sheen.

Still, this is a Lohan habit. Hire her; pay her, she steals from you. Back in January we learned that she pocketed on of Elizabeth Taylor’s bracelets, and before that, in October, she ALLEGEDLY got her sticky fingers on $15,000 of wardrobe from Scary Movie 5; she also stole a necklace in 2011 and, again, ALLEGEDLY,  a mink coat, worth $11,000, in 2008.

Rapper Busta Rhymes ALLEGEDLY has a slur-filled hissy fit this past week in Miami Beach, when he began hurling anti-gay epithets at employees of Cheeseburger Baby after he and his entourage were told they couldn’t cut in line.

Don’t they know who he is? Does anyone, because, seriously, I don’t.

Stephanie Vitori, the owner of Cheeseburger Baby, says the rapper's party became belligerent when the restaurant refused to take their order before others waiting in line, and then, when he finally got his burger and found that his condiments had been served on the side, he called the server a "fag" and Vitori a "bitch."

According to Vitori, after an employee explained that they always serve condiments on the side—to avoid the dreaded soggy bun—Busta shrieked, "F*** you, fag! I'm not leaving until I get ketchup, mayo, salt and pepper on my burger."

Vitori then instructed employees to open Rhymes' mayo and ketchup packets and dress his burger to get him out of the restaurant. He left before Miami Beach Police arrived, but Vitori has filed a report.

I’d say he should ‘a bustard a move and gotten his homophobic ass outta South Beach.

More on Lohan ….

Prosecutors are still trying to figure out what to do about Lindsay’s “lockdown rehab” because, they’ve just discovered, there is no such thing in this country as lockdown rehab, unless it’s called prison. So, they might be forced to put her in regular rehab so she can continue doing her drinking and drugging, and probably check herself out at will when the party bus rolls up, or send her to jail.

I say jail.

But, what’s interesting about all of this is that wherever Lindsay ends up—other than the morgue—she’ll being taking her Adderall with her.  She claims she’s been taking the drug for her AD/HD—which no one knows if she really has—for years, and is demanding to be allowed to take it in rehab; or jail.

Seriously, when does the drug addict-drunk driver-jewel thief get to set the rules?

On to some JLo….

Jennifer Lopez hasn’t been doing much lately, other than babysitting her boyfriend while nannies watch her own kids. But, she was scheduled to perform at the opening ceremony of the Indian Premiere League’s cricket tournament until ….

She began making JLo-ass-sized demands.

She wanted a private jet, and hotel rooms for her army of engineers and technicians, er, hairdressers, make-up people, and stylists, assistants, personal chefs, ass patters.

But officials at the Indian Premiere League balked at her demands and booked Pitbull instead because all he wanted was, well, a job.

A source—and you know it’s boy-toy Casper looking for extra cash to stash for when JLo bounces him—says, “The demands made on behalf of Jennifer were outrageous. She effectively priced herself out of the event. It was an idiotic move because the audience for this event is huge. It’s like the Super Bowl halftime show. Last year it drew 56 million viewers.”

A rep for Lopez said the reason she didn’t perform in India was because she was busy.

Being a diva.

I think I’ll start calling her Lady Gogo, as in Go! Go!

Gaga is pissing me off. First, you know, and this isn’t her fault, but she cancels the majority of her last tour because, as an old lady often does, she had hip surgery.

No fault. But then she comes out with a Golden Wheelchair and is pushed all over town by her peeps because, you know, old lady hip. Except ….

This week she was seen walking, all by herself, into a yoga class, wearing heels. And then after the class, she left the studio in her stupid Louis Vuitton wheelchair.

To be fair, the heels weren’t her usual gravity defying shoes, but still, she was wearing heels before class and wheels after class.

Seriously. Go. Go. Gaga.

I guess since Kim Kash Kow Kardashian poked a hole in a condom so she could snare Kanye West with a baby, it’s been left to what I thought was The Normal Kardashian to go all asshat stupid.

It seems that Khloe’s husband, Lamar Odom started a charity called Cathy’s Kids—named after his mother who died of cancer. Nice, no? Well, it turns out that ever since this little charity was formed back in Ott-Four, it hasn’t given a single dime to cancer research but instead has paid Lamar’s high school basketball coach and best man at his wedding $72,000 a year and financed youth basketball teams.

Lamar ain’t talking, but Khloe is: “Cathy’s Kids was formed with several purposes in mind, including benefitting underprivileged youth and cancer research. A decision was ultimately made that the charity should focus on one of those purposes—to help enrich the lives of underprivileged inner-city youth. It accomplished that goal. Cathy’s Kids helped fund multiple AAU basketball teams providing underprivileged youth with opportunities enriching their lives, providing financial support for coaching and travel to tournaments, helping inner-city youth on a path toward success and leading many participants to go on to college.”

So, Khloe thinks a charity that was created to honor a woman who died from cancer by raising money for cancer, does better if it gives its money for basketball programs?

Nothing shady about that Khloe.

Remember when Halle Berry’s baby daddy, Gabriel Aubry, got into a scuffle with her new boyfriend, Olivier Martinez, and everyone made it out that Aubry had anger issues and he was all at fault and stuff?

Well, maybe not. See, this past week, while being swarmed by paparazzi at LAX, Halle became pissed off when Olivier began kicking the photographers. Halle, her daughter Nahla, and Martinez had just come back from a Hawaiian vacation when the photogs descended on them. Halle started screaming, “Get away from the child. What the f*ck is wrong with you people. There’s a child.”

And then Olivier brought the feet to the party. When they got to their SUV, Martinez ALLEGEDLY booted one of the photographers before Halle got him into the car.

I think that whole Aubry Is A Dangerous Man business a few months ago was just another Halle fib.

Let's end with something kinda funny.

i often make jokes about Lindsay Lohan releasing a statement from under a bar somewhere, so imagine my glee when I found just such a picture of Lohan partying it up in Brazil before she begins her ninety-day-Adderall-fueled lockdown.

Lindsay. Under a bar. There's no place like home!