Random Musings

This week Pope Francis lamented about the “gay lobby” that was at work at the Vatican in private remarks to the leadership of a key Latin American church group.

In related news, I can confirm that the sun rose in the east this morning.

Up there in the big city, New York City, residents of a certain building are living in fear for their lives and have filed suit to stop a …. Wait for it …. Denny’s restaurant from opening in their building.’

The condo board at 150 Nassau St. has portrayed, ahem, cough cough, “America’s diner” as unfit for their upscale address—where a 3-bedroom unit recently sold for $3.5 million. The suit contends Denny’s restaurants are a “haven for violence, disorderly conduct, and alcohol-drenched patrons.”

Your point? I mean, if I had a nickel for every time I was drunk and disorderly in a Denny’s I could’a bought that three million dollar condo.

Just sayin’.

Without a single landslide, earthquake, or volcanic eruption, more than 2,400 gay and lesbian couples have gotten married in Washington state since the state’s voter-approved same-sex marriage law took effect last December.

According to the Department of Health:

—Same-sex marriages occurred in 35 of the state’s 39 counties

—Same-sex marriages represented more than 20 percent of the 11,661 marriages that took place during that same period of time.

—King County had the highest number of same-sex marriages, with 1,321.

—63% of same-sex marriages were female couples.

—14% of the weddings were for couples who had traveled to Washington state from other states.

And, like I said, Washington is still standing.

Wildwood, New Jersey Mayor Ernest Troiano Jr. thinks he's found a way to put one of the town's problems, um, for lack of a better word, behind it.

He is set to ban, ban, BAN overly saggy pants; no ifs, ands or butts. The city is set to pass yet another law regulating how people dress on its boardwalk; it already bans shirtless folks, and shoeless folks, and now, baggy drawered folks, too.

But who determines the amount of acceptable sag? Well, apparently the rule will be pants that sag more than 3 inches below the hips, exposing either skin or underwear.

I think I might have found my calling: Saggy Pant Measurer.

Troiano said:  "When you have good families who call you up and say, 'I've been coming here 20 years, 30 years, 40 years and I'm not going to any longer because I'm not going to subject my children or my parents or grandparents to seeing some kid walk down the boardwalk with their butt hanging out,' you have to do something," he said. "I'm not one of the Fruit of the Loom underwear inspectors; I'm not one of the grapes. I don't want to see it."

I’m.Not.One.Of.The.Grapes?

LeAnn Rimes is all over TV plugging her newest album, and talking about her marriage to Eddie Cibrian, whom she met and f**ked while they were both married to other people.

She said that, while it was hard … hee hee hard …. She admitted to her family and her husband at the time, that she had made the mistake of cheating.

Really LeAnn? I know you’re a songwriter, but now you’re also a history re-writer?

Your ‘admission’ of infidelity came when the tabloids began publishing pictures of you and the married-to-someone-else-too Eddie getting’ all snoggy at an LA coffee shop. This makes one think that if you hadn’t gotten caught, you never would have admitted a thing. Then she goes on to say that she trusts Eddie, and he trusts her.

Two people who screwed around on their spouses trust one another.

I.Laugh. And then I ask LeAnn to STFU.

And, since we’ve already discussed same-sex marriage in Washington, let’s look at some good news out of California.

A new poll in the LA Times reveals that 58% of the state's registered voters believe same-sex marriage should be legal, compared with 36% against. Just three years ago, the numbers were 52% in favor and 40% against.

It’s gonna happen people.

So, there’s this thing called a Purity Ball, where fathers get to take their virgin daughters:

Dads, escort your daughter to an unforgettable event where hundreds of young ladies dressed in formal attire and their dashing fathers will celebrate purity! This extraordinary evening includes an elegant atmosphere, pictures, gourmet dinner and dessert, flowers, music and other surprises sure to delight both father and daughter. Legacy’s President and popular speaker, Carrie Abbott, will deliver a unique message to dads and daughters and our Master of Ceremonies will facilitate a purity covenant.

Yeah, whatever, but ….

What’s funny is the price: $69. Yes, fathers and daughters and 69. Seriously, did know one at Purity Central think maybe they should have changed that to $68.95?

Henry Cavill.

Super.Man.

I am not really big on the cartoon-cum-feature-film genre and usually wait to see them on TV, but there’s something about Henry that I just can’t put my finger on which makes me wanna see this one of the big peen, er, screen.

I wish I could put my finger on it. Hell, I’d need both hands.

Ever made a mistake at work? I have. My first mistake was taking the job. I kid.

But this guy, over there to Germany, made the most amazing mistake ever.

The man, an employee of a German bank, was in the middle of transferring 62.40 euros from a customer’s bank account when he fell asleep at the keyboard and his head mashed the number 2 key, turning that 62.40 transfer into one of 222,222,222.22 euros, AKA $300 million!

And I thought I had f**ked up on occasion!

Speaking of millions, the group One Million Moms—which, according to their Facebook page, actually number in the 56,000 range, but Fifty-Six Thousand Moms doesn’t sound so powerful—is going after Kraft foods for that ad right there:

‘Last week's issue of People Magazine had the most disgusting ad on the inside front cover that we have ever seen Kraft produce. A full 2-page ad features a n*ked man lying on a picnic blanket with only a small portion of the blanket barely covering his g*nitals. It is easy to see what the ad is really selling. A person has to look closely to see the item the company is marketing because the salad dressing bottle is so small next to the male model, picnic basket and other food items. There is also a small Kraft logo in the upper corners with the words "Silverware Optional - Let's Get Zesty." The website getmezesty.com is listed in the bottom corner.

Kraft has gone too far and will push away loyal, conservative customers with this new ad campaign. Christians will not be able to buy Kraft dressings or any of their products until they clean up their advertising. The consumers they are attempting to attract - women and mothers - are the very ones they are driving away. Who will want Kraft products in their fridge or pantry if this vulgarity is what they represent? One Million Moms cannot get over the gall of this company. It is unnecessary for Kraft to use s*x to sell salad dressing!’

PS the little asterisks in the words naked and sex and genitals are there because, as the OMM says, their word can get out against browsers that filter against those words.

Or, because OMM gets all hot-n-bothered typing naked sex genitals.

Hillary’s on Twitter y’all, and her first Tweet was to the guys who created the Texts from Hillary craze. I can’t wait till she’s President.