Hidden Voices, Coming Out

Coming out as gay is a hard thing to do because you never know what might happen. You could lose your friends, you could lose your family, your job, and, sometimes, even your life. I can understand why some folks struggle with the idea, even though the view from this side of the closet door is much nicer.

One person who had a lot to lose by coming out was Gary Meier. In fact, Meier really struggled with staying closeted because the idea of making that announcement could cost him everything he held dear. So he thought about it, and thought about, and even took a leave of absence from his job so he could make a decision. And since we’re talking about it, it’s clear what decision he made.

Last June, the Reverend Gary Meier told his parishioners at Saints Teresa and Bridget Church in St. Louis that he was taking a leave of absence “to discern what ministry God was calling me to do.” He’d already told his boss, St. Louis Archbishop Robert Carlson that he would no longer teach the Catholic Church’s stance on homosexuality.

“I have tried over the years to reconcile my silence as a gay priest with that of the Church’s increasingly anti-gay stance. I have been unsuccessful. I was hopeful that I could find a way to have integrity while remaining part of a hierarchy that is anti-gay — I was unsuccessful.”—Gary Meier, from his book, Hidden Voices: Reflections of a Gay, Catholic Priest

Hidden voices. An apt title because Meier had first published the book back in 2011, anonymously, in an effort to keep his job, and keep his identity a secret. Now, however, the book has been republished with one change: his name is on the cover.

His decision to out himself, in print, and in person, came from watching the Church harden their stance more vocally, and more actively, on the LGBT community. Meier firmly believes that the Catholic Church’s position on homosexuality is a contributing factor in growing suicide rates among gay teenagers.

“My position is that our teaching is causing harm … We ought to own some of that. The church’s hard line against homosexuality causes that kind of damage.”—Gary Meier

Interestingly enough, the Catholic Church, while it has a very clear view on homosexuality, does not have an ‘official’ stance on gay priests; their belief is that a priest must be celibate, and that is all that matters; a good priest is a good priest. Of course, a good priest is also one who stays closeted, and silent, and doesn’t question the faith, but it was because of the Catholic Church’s stance against LGBT rights, including marriage equality, DOMA, ENDA, the Boy Scouts recent acceptance of gay scouts, etc., that Gary Meier questioned his church, and its leaders, and decided to come out.

While keeping the secret from his ‘boss,’ Meier—who recently celebrated the 15th anniversary of his ordination—says his sexual orientation was never a secret to his family and friends. In fact, during his interviews at the Kenrick Seminary, he answered truthfully to questions about his orientation. When he was asked if he could be celibate, he said, “I think so.”

“Celibacy is a rule the church imposes on its clergy. It’s always part of the package. This is not about celibacy.”—Gary Meier

Meier says his only relationship is “with the people of God,” and that he’s been faithful to his vows. He would like to continue with his work in the Church, continue leading his parishioners, those ‘people of God,’ but knows that it’s highly unlikely he’ll be allowed to do so.

“To be a priest and active in ministry, you can’t say what I’m saying. I don’t think I’ll be getting any more paychecks from the archdiocese.”—Gary Meier

And by saying what he says, Meier has effectively removed himself from the priesthood, By standing with gay Catholics, and against the Church’s teaching, and by taking a leave of absence to find himself, understand himself, and accept himself, he has stopped administering the sacraments. But, I doubt he’ll miss it, because what he says now, and what he does now, is the real Gary Meier, not the man behind the robes, the man who, in silence, often, stood with the Catholic Church against the LGBT community.

“I see my speaking out as an act of love toward a community which was born of God’s radical inclusivity.”—Gary Meier

Coming out is hard. You can lose so much, but, as Gary Meier says, he gained personal integrity. And that’s worth the price of stepping from the darkness into the light. He may have lost his job, he may have lost his voice within the Church, but he hasn’t lost his faith, and he hasn’t lost himself.

Plus, he gets a copy of The Gay Agenda and the obligatory Coming Out Toaster Oven.

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Random Musings

In the Color Me Not Surprised News, actor and singer, and Gomer Pyle of The Andy Griffith Show, Jim Nabors has come out as a gay man. Not exactly the biggest secret, you know. But, in the Pleasant Surprise News, is the fact that Nabors came out, to the world, because he married his longtime partner, Stan Cadwallader, in Seattle.

Nabors released a statement to Hawaii News Now:

"I'm 82 and he's in his 60s and so we've been together for 38 years and I'm not ashamed of people knowing, it's just that it was such a personal thing, I didn't tell anybody. I'm very happy that I've had a partner of 38 years and I feel very blessed. And, what can I tell you, I'm just very happy."

Congratulations to the happy couple, and, of course, as both a wedding gift and coming out present, they will be receiving the Homo HQ Coming Out Toaster Oven with our good wishes.

So, Cissy Houston has written a book about her daughter, Whitney, and timed it to come out right before the first anniversary of Whitney’s death.

Lovely parenting, but, hey, she’s got bills.

But one of the most interesting parts of Houston’s new almost-tell-all is that if Whitney had come out to Cissy as a lesbian she would not have liked it, or condoned it.

Lovely parenting.

Also comes word that it wasn’t Bobby Brown who hooked Whitney on The Cocaine; it was Whitney’s own brother, Michael, who says she began using back in the 80s, loooooong before she met Brown. Now, Brown doesn’t get points for that because he’s a drug addict and spousal batterer, but now we know that the whole Houston clan was wrong that he got Whitney into drugs.

Cissy also mentions that, as Whitney got older, she rarely saw her daughter, which got me to wondering….

Whitney is gay. Whitney’s longtime friend, and personal assistant, Robyn Crawford was her lover. Whitney knew Mama Houston would not be having as lesbian daughter so she distanced herself from Mama. Whitney wanted a relationship with Mama, and wanted to be open about Robyn, but couldn’t, so she took to drugs to self-medicate.

Now, this could be totally off-base, or Whitney Houston could have been just another case of a young gay person turning to drugs because their own family refused to accept their sexual orientation.

That’s just my Two Cents.

Out in Wyoming a bill to make same-sex marriage legal failed by a 5-4 vote.

But, and this is a little but, the vote for a domestic partnerships bill was approved by a 7-2 vote.

It’s nice, you know, but it’s ‘less than’.

You can do better Wyoming.
UPDATE: Apparently not. 
The first pro-gay legislation that has reached Wyoming's House floor for debate was defeated Wednesday as the House voted 35-24 to reject a domestic partnership bill that would have given same-sex couples in the state the opportunity to gain most of the legal rights of marriage.

This.Kills.Me.

A former Episcopal priest, who is royally pissed off that his church hierarchy has accepted The Gays, has decided to switch teams and play for the Catholics because their Gay Hate runs deep.

So, John Cornelius has become New York state's first married Catholic priest, though he has agreed, as part of the deal to switch sides, to stop screwing his wife and become celibate.

His wife is said to be ecstatic over the arrangement.

So, Immigration Reform, huh?

And bipartisan at that.

Meaning the GOP is onboard. And what a surprise that is, considering one of those GOPers is John McCain who was so virulently anti-immigration that just a couple of years ago, while running for re-election, he proposed stricter immigration laws, higher border fences and guards with guns to shoot the brown folks who might be sneaking in through Arizona.

Why the switch Grampa? Did you suddenly have a change of heart or….what’s that? Yes, the GOP lost the White House this last November in large part because their candidate was a dick and because the Hispanic vote went overwhelmingly Obama.

So, you’re pandering.

Same old GOP.

But, while we’re on the subject of Immigration reform, and that bipartisan effort, which came just minutes before President Obama unveiled his Reform plans, let’s take note that McCain’s plan doesn’t include any mention of same-sex binational couples because he says, and I’ll paraphrase, “The Gays don’t matter.”

Obama’s plan, however, does have inclusions for same-sex binational couples.

So, while McCain and his ilk are trying to pander to the Hispanic vote they’re still unable to handle The Gays.

Again, same old GOP.

MGB™, aka Mama Grizzly Bore™, aka Half-Term-Quitter-Delusional-Fuck-Monkey-Blabberer™, has been quietly ‘let go’ from FauxNews.

Finally they did something right.

But MGB™ says her fight isn’t over and she’ll be Teabaggin’ till the End Times:

"I was raised to never retreat [unlike when she quit being Governor of Alaska because it got too hard] and to pick battles wisely, and all in due season. When it comes to defending our republic, we haven't begun to fight! But we delight in those who underestimate us."

This is nearly everyone in the world with more than two brain cells to rub together.

Face it, MGB™, you’re done. When the most inane, rightwing, conservative, Tea Party loving news channel calls you irrelevant, you’re irrelevant.

Go have someone write a book for your, and I suggest the title, Going Unemployed.

The Westboro Baptist Church has filed a Supreme Court amicus brief against the repeal of Proposition 8 and while they say they support "neither party" in the case, their, um, legal citations are all Bible verses.

Yeah.

So, there was this guy, in Tennessee naturally, who took his dog to be euthanized.

The dog was mean? No.

The dog was rabid? No.

The dog was incurably ill? No.

The man thought the dog was .... wait for it .... gay.

So, of course, like most things that are presumed to be gay it should be put to death,

Luckily there are sane heads, even in Tennessee--sorry to the Sane Headed Tennesseans who read ISBl .... I don't count you among the crazies--have rescued the dog and will neuter him and give him all the appropriate shots and set him up for adoption.

To an owner with a brain, this time.

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