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Friday, March 8, 2013

PR 11 Ep 7: If It Looks Like A Duck, And Quacks Like A Duck, It's A Prom Dress .... WTF?

Posted on 1:00 PM by Unknown

Well, this is yet another mash-up of challenges. It another unconventional challenge mixed in with another product placement challenge. The Duck Brand Duck Tape Prom Dress Challenge. Yeah, that’s right; prom dresses made from duck—not duct--tape. And, to make it more daring, the designers will show their dresses first to a group of high school students, whose votes will be worth 20% of the final total.

Mean girls in the house!

But, before we start, we’re gonna play Team Switcheroo. As last week’s winner Stanley gets to pick his partner, and, well, he and Richard are just too good together, and Richard just knows that he and Stanley will rock this because they are perfect together and ….
Stanley picks Layana.

WTF? Richard: “He probably thinks she has a better aesthetic than me, but what he doesn’t know is that my specialty is prom dresses. Touché.”

Kate, who only wants only to work with Tu—and I keep wondering why and then, later, we’ll find out, says, “There’s no one in this room that I want to work with other than Tu. I’ve worked with Patricia; I love her, but we don’t have complimentary aesthetics. Michelle, Layana and Amanda are bitches. You get them together and they’re like catty schoolgirls. The other people just think they’re hot sh*t and I don’t want to deal with that.”

Luckily, as Tim pulls out the Button Bag, Kate gets the next choice, and she stays with TU. Michelle picks Amanda, Richard and Daniel team up—and Richard soon forgets his crush on Stanley and falls in love with Daniel, while Patricia and Samantha are also paired up.

PS Samantha is not happy.

Let’s rip ….

MICHELLE and AMANDA
They both agree that this challenge is definitely one in which they can push the envelope so Michelle immediately picks the Camouflage Duck Tape. Yes, she did. Sidenote: in prom season in South Carolina, I have seen many, many, prom dresses made of camouflage material. I guess because prom here means dancing and deer hunting.

Luckily Amanda nixes the camouflage, and then she picks up some Tie-dyed Duck Tape and, well, as someone who lived in California I have seen a lot of tie-dye and it never says prom. It says ‘My mom’s not home so let’s get high at my house.’

Luckily Michelle nixes the tie-dye, and they deiced to create a kind of Punk Herringbone pattern. This is a win, I think. It’s new and not just standard issue Duck Tape.

Tim loves the idea of creating a pattern, and the idea that there are two sizes to the pattern, and the idea that it’s kind of Bad Girl Punk, but he’s worried that Michelle and Amanda won’t finish. I’m worried too, when the model comes in and the herringbone doesn’t go all the way around the dress. Luckily, though, they finished it in time.

In the gym, their dress was the Bad Girl dress; I could picture the girl who stole John Travolta away from Olivia Newton-John in Grease wearing that dress. I loved their cool pattern, and the semi-mullet shape of the dress, but, uh oh, Michelle and Amanda are like the girls with no dates. None of the students are staying long, and it looks like Michelle, and Amanda, will be Bottoming out on the runway.

Again.

I dubbed their dress Bad Girl Judy Jetson, and I mean that as a compliment. Guest Judge Chris Benz likes that it's modern and fun and even sinister. The Adorable Zac Posen™ –how I missed his little cuteness last week—thought it had a great shape, and said the herringbone pattern was a great design choice. He didn’t like the cut-outs, but then cut-outs are over because they’re everywhere. Nina had no issue with the cut-outs, and called the dress very Gwen Stefani—which, I’m guessing by the reaction of Amanda and Michelle, was a good thing. In fact, Nina gave it the rave: “It’s a showstopper.” Heidi liked that it moved like a real dress.

Michelle finally gets her first win of the season, and $5,000 was donated to Autism Speaks in her name, which makes the win even sweeter.

STANLEY and LAYANA
Layana is not happy that Richard took all the gold tape and pouts and moans and glowers at the camera. Methinks Layana has a problem getting what she wants and I’d be right. She isn’t happy until Stanley slaps her out of it—sadly, not an actual slap, but more of a verbal, “Deal with it” slap.

Stanley wants pink and Layana freaks because she hates pink and girls won’t wear pink to prom—especially in New York City! She wants Zebra and, well, Stanley, not wanting to get into a physical altercation, let’s her have the Zebra. And then he gets his pink on, in the shape of a wack-a-doodle bow.

Tim likes what they’ve done, but agrees that, while it looks current and well-constructed, it needs the Pow of the Pink. Layana pouts some more, but just as Stanley raises his hand, she climbs on board. In fact, she came on board so strongly that she seemed to act on the runway like the bow was here idea.

That’s Layana.

The dress looks cute and chic in the gym, and one student, a future PR designtestant, called it an 80s throwback. I didn’t think it looked 80s; I thought it was modern and edgy—though not too edgy—and cool.  And the pink bow was a great Stanley Addition.

Nina loved that the duck tape had a three-dimensional quality to it, and loved it from head-to-toe while Heidi called it modern and fashion forward and loved the cool, big bow and the duck tape petticoat. The Adorable Zac Posen™ loved that it moved and praised the styling. Chris Benz called it electric and said it had so many different elements that all worked well together; he loved the fetish-y Greek warrior bodice which makes me wonder how Chris gets his freak on.

Stanley, who is on a roll, and Layana are Safe.

PATRICIA and SAMANTHA
These two are the epitome of don’t work well together. Patricia is creating another one of her cut-out, layered patterns and Samantha isn’t feeling it. She doesn’t get it, but she doesn’t know how to make Patricia stop.

So, what’s the next best thing? Patricia makes a dress and Samantha makes a dress, and Tim comes in and bitchslaps them both. He tells them that they have to work together and they have to work next to each other and they have to get along. Is this for high school, or day care? And is Tim the principal or the headmistress? Or, does he work for Hallmark because he calls their dress[es] ‘fabulous wrapping paper.’

Which can’t be good.

In the high school gym, I thought it looked like Jiffy pop and that made me hungry so I hit pause and popped some microwave corn. When I came back, ate the corn, and saw the dress again, all I felt was sick.

Nina compliments Samantha's work with the closure on the back, and says the dress is very Katie Perry; this dress, oddly enough in my mind, got the highest number of votes from the students. Heidi liked it because she loves Patricia’s ‘kooky’ aesthetic. Chris Benz thought the proportion was off and wished it had been tighter and shorter, while The Adorable Zac Posen™ loved Patricia’s fabric creation and the weirdness of it; he  joked that all the men will stick to this prom girl.

We learn that Samantha and Patricia were thisclose to winning. I learned that sometimes the judges are out of their effing minds.

DANIEL and RICHARD
♫ ♪Richard and Daniel sittin’ in a tree, making a gold dress so ug-lee♪♫

In a flash, as soon as the teams are assigned Richard and Daniel go for the gold, because, well, either they think gold signifies a win, or they’re two big queens who love shiny things. Or, a third possibility, Richard knew Layana, paired with his former crush/stalking victim, Stanley, wanted gold and he would not let her win that, too!

And they decide to go for a Beyoncé-Rihanna type dress, and I kept thinking that Beyoncé and Rihanna have two different styles, so will this dress be a mess? Yes.

Daniel is the first to notice that the gold tape makes the dress look like a baked potato, so what do they decide to do? Well, potato becomes potato chips and they wonder if adding Ruffles™ to the bottom of it might help. Tim comes in, and when they say they want the Ruffles™ to be done in kind of a matador-jacket inspired pattern, Tim says he likes it. I’m wondering if Tim’s taste level has burned out after all these years, or if he’s just trying to throw Walnut Head and The Mustache under the bus. Seriously, Tim? Really?

 When this look was shown to the high school students, all I could think was Mariachi Hooker in Spanish Harlem. I was thinking I could hear Marc Anthony singing about her as she walked ….. And that isn’t good. What is also not good is that Richard calls himself a pageant mom, or pageant queen for the second week in a row. Is that for real, or is he angling for his own show on Lifetime, Here Comes Richie Boo Boo?

This dress was a mess. A stiff flash from the past mess. Heidi agreed, calling it old-fashioned, and kept wondering, ‘What were they thinking? WHAT were they thinking?” The Adorable Zac Posen™ liked Richards’ lattice detail but thought it got lost on the side of the dress; he also questioned the fit. He likes Richard and Daniel but is wondering why they never seem to push themselves. Chris Benz called it dated and the most obscene version of a prom dress. Nina cared not a whit for the dress but berated Richard and Daniel for going from heroes to zeroes in one week; she called their work a Tin Dress Train Wreck.

Luckily, for the duo, the judges felt something more cringe-worthy, and Auf-putting was also on the runway.

KATE and TU
As the challenge begins, I now see why Kate simply must work with TU. It’s because—as sweet as she tries to appear—she can steamroller right over him. Tu creates a flirty short dress design, but Kate says long dresses are better and need less duck tape; um, Kate, there are like a thousand yards of duck tape. Tu could create a prom dress float and still have tape left over. But, Kate wins, because Tu doesn’t stand up for himself, they--and by they I mean Kate--create a long gown in Denim Duck Tape.

When Tim sees the dress, he wonders why the duck tape goes horizontally—like a Mummy, mind you—and once again Kate talks about not having enough tape. But, Tim says the dress looks flat and uninspired and not flirty—like Tu’s design—so Kate decides to cut lace pieces of tape and fringy pieces of tape and apply them along the bust and the bottom for texture. My thoughts: applying all that texture to a flat dress makes it look like a flat dress with texture.

When their design walks at the high school, my first thought was that it looked like a reject from an old Gilligan’s Island episode, where Ginger Grant was gonna put on a show and the Professor found a bunch of tape on the Minnow and made her a dress. I guess that’s my long-winded version of saying the dress wasn’t new or modern.

Chris Benz thought it looked old and square—not in shape, but in aesthetic. Nina had issues with the length, and did battle with The Adorable Zac Posen™ who thought long dresses are fine for proms these days. But The Adorable Zac Posen™ didn’t like that there was no fantasy with the dress. Heidi wondered where Tu was in the dress since Kate kept taking credit for the length and the detail and, well, the whole shootin’ match.  Nina didn’t like the old lady duck tape, even after Kate told it was Denim Patterned Duck Tape: “You had didn’t like the old lady teak tape, even after Kate told it was Denim Patterned Duck Tape: “You had 38 colors and prints and you use old lady teal?” I think that was followed by Auf with their heads.

Or just Auf’d in a surprise double elimination.

Tu went for not speaking up, and Kate went for speaking up too much.

MY TAKE
On the "which is the worst" dilemma, I would have given it to Richard and Daniel. Their choice of the gold, and the Ruffles™ and the whole “It’s Molly Ringwald in Sixteen Candles’ should have gotten them Auf’d. This was a modern take on prom and they referenced a 30-year-old movie.

But, Tu just coasted, and Kate just steamrolled, so, that was deserving of a Get out of here!

I’m glad Michelle finally won. I like her style—save that Miranda Lambert mess—and her personality, and the idea that she will push herself creatively.

Richard’s head still bothers me, in that he’s so full of himself and that it looks like a walnut. Daniel’s mustache needs its own show, though without Daniel and his Giddy-Two-Shoes confessionals.

I love Stanley’s hair. I’ve always wanted that hair.

I agree that Patricia is kooky, but will kooky get to The Tents?

I’m seeing Stanley and Michelle showing, but who else …. ?

I’ll let that drop for now because next week …. OMG …. Male Strippers. I’m glad the strippers weren’t this week because all I could picture was a duck tape gold thong; and that isn’t just ugly, it would hurt.

What did YOU think? 

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